Satisfaction

Be Satisfied with Me – Saint Anthony of Padua

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone,
To have a deep soul relationship with another,
To be loved thoroughly and exclusively.

But to a Christian, God says, “No, not until you are satisfied,
Fulfilled and content with being loved by me alone,
With giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me.
With having an intensely personal and unique relationship with me alone.

Discovering that only in me is your satisfaction to be found,
Will you be capable of the perfect human relationship,
That I have planned for you.
You will never be united to another
Until you are united with me.
Exclusive of anyone or anything else.
Exclusive of any other desires or longings.
I want you to stop planning, to stop wishing, and allow me to give you
The most thrilling plan existing . . . one you cannot imagine.
I want you to have the best. Please allow me to bring it to you.

You just keep watching me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am.
Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you.
Just wait, that’s all. Don’t be anxious, don’t worry
Don’t look around at things others have gotten
Or that I have given them
Don’t look around at the things you think you want,
Just keep looking off and away up to me,
Or you’ll miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love
Far more wonderful than you could dream of.

You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready,
I am working even at this moment
To have both of you ready at the same time.
Until you are both satisfied exclusively with me.

Saint Paul and Buzz Feed

Isn't it interesting how we talk a lot about love? It seems to be almost a daily discussion.  We love the newest restaurant, the grades we got on our final exams, the coffee we stopped and got after a long day at work.  

We use the word love so much, we have become desensitized to its ramifications.  What about love in a romantic relationship?  What is the response when someone asks: 

Don't you love me? 

What does true, authentic love look like in a relationship?  Can you have a loving relationship with someone and still use birth control?

About six months ago, Buzz Feed had a photographic journal piece on women who had decided to not use contraception or birth control.   How does this decision show love? And why is contraception blocking love?

Love is Patient

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Love realizes that a good thing at the wrong time is the wrong thing. It recognizes that a person is never a sum of their parts, but rather a whole child of God made in His image.  Love is giving up control of every aspect of our life and placing it all in the hands of God. 

Contraception can't wait...for some things.  It can't wait for the pleasure of sex.  The opportunity to express supposed devotion and all-in commitment.  But it can wait for other things.  It can wait for commitment.  It can wait for children.  It can wait for authentic love.

Cameron Diaz said in the movie Vanilla Sky, "Don't you know that when you sleep with someone your body makes a promise whether you do or not." 

Love is Kind

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By the definition, authentic love wills the good of the other as other.  Love is free, total, faithful and fruitful.  It gives everything at all costs, no matter what and is open to life.  

Contraception demands a high price (more on that, keep reading), is limiting, puts barriers on love and denies the gift of life to both parents.


It is not proud.  It does not dishonor others.

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Authentic love looks at how humanity is created (Male and Female) and sees that it is good.  It does not chemically alter a woman's body, a woman's thoughts, and a woman's hormones.

Studies have proven that the pill can change how a woman looks at a man.  It can change who she sees as attractive, but even greater health risks.  Women who rely on a birth control that combines estrogen and progestin have a 41% increase of having a stroke, 50% higher chance of getting blood clots, 29% increase in heart attacks, 22% increase of cardiovascular disease and a 26% increase in having breast cancer.

Lindsay Abrams from The Atlantic would have us believe this: "The rest of us can marvel at the hormonal quirks wrought by birth control and perhaps resolve that they're a small price to pay for preventing unintended pregnancy."

Really?  Because I think that being able to see a man for who he is without a pill mentally altering my thought capacity is a pretty large price to pay.  


It is not self-seeking.

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Love sees the entirety of humans as beautiful.  Including fertility.  

Contraception rejects the human being as a whole - body, mind and soul - especially fertility.  Contraception encourages use of another for self pleasure. It says "I love you so much.  I love you so much that I want to be physical with you now.  I want to sleep with you - even if that means increasing your medical risks, your future children, and your future spouse.  Can't you tell that I love you?"

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

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Love sees contraception and birth control for what it is.  It recognizes the truth that contraception harms a woman's body even while claiming to help women in general.  In exchange for 'regular' cycles and 'freedom from the risk of pregnancy,' the pill increases women's chances of breast cancer.  A study in India found that after a prolonged use of oral contraceptives, increased the users risk of breast cancer from normal level (1.2%) to 11.9%.  The reason?  Dr. Umesh Kapil told Times of India, "Breast cancer is caused by repeated exposure of cells to circulating ovarian hormones, and long term use of birth control pills, which contain estrogen and progesterone, may contribute to the elevated risk."

It always protects 

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Contraception has removed the aspect of responsibility from the act of love.

Instead of protection, the pill and other forms of contraception provide the ability for objectification.  For using someone for what they can give instead of loving them for who they are.  

And this is just the protection of the woman - what about that baby that could be conceived during sex?  The pill acts as an abortifacient - you could be killing your child without ever knowing you are pregnant.

Always perseveres 

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I know.  I know about the countless doctor appointments whose goal it seems is to convince you that the only way to cope is contraception.  

But I also know about the joy that comes from authenticity.  And the help available from incredible resources that don't have anything to do with the pill or 'safe sex.'

Is it hard? Sure.  Is it worth it? I'm convinced that true, authentic love for my future spouse (whether that's a man or Christ) is worth it all.  

Love Never Fails 

You are more than your parts

             
                                      
Tonight at 10:00 pm, thousands will tune in to their televisions or web stream as scantily dressed women are put on display.

And it's not on the porn channel.

Instead it's a so-called fashion show that celebrates the objectification of women for the gratification of others.

It's a reducing of daughters of God down to their bra size and the length of their legs.

And it's hailed with great acclimation.

What is so wrong about the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, or even their advertisement in general?
It's just lingerie.  The women choose to walk and model the seasons trends.  Everyone is paid.  No one is getting hurt.

That couldn't be a bigger lie.

Despite the smiles and laughter, compliments and beauty that is shown on that screen tonight and in advertisements through the year, Victoria's Secret doesn't reveal enough.

Their models are dressed in barely-there ensembles but they aren't showing the world who they really are.

They are showing a body and not a soul.  A lingerie set and not the heart and mind underneath the skin of the girl.  

I am in no way saying that the woman's body is ugly.  Or that it deserves more clothing because no one should have to see that.  Instead, I'm proposing that the woman's body is so beautiful that it needs veiled.

What do we veil?  In the Catholic Church, there is a veil over the tabernacle.  It's not because Christ is a wretched presence no one wants to see.  When you go to a wedding, brides have the choice of wearing a veil.  Not because this is the most ugly day of her life.  Because we veil things that deserve honor and respect.  Because an aura of mystery intensifies the beauty that lies beneath the surface.

Victoria's Secret Fashion shows do not promote the beauty that is inherently placed in the souls of their models.  A beauty that comes from being a child of God, loved into existence.  Instead, it places value on the skin surface appearance.

In an interview with ABC, Kylie Bisutti, a former VS Angel, explained the reason she left her position as a model for the company.  

 “I was doing my makeup in the mirror one day and she was watching me,” Bisutti said.  “She looked at me and was like, ‘You know, I think I want to stop eating so I can look like you.’”

“It just broke my heart because she looks up to me and I didn't want to be that type of person that she thought she had to do that to be beautiful,” she said.  “Thousands of girls that think that being beautiful is an outer issue and really it’s a heart issue.”

It's a heart issue.
It's realizing that our bodies are ways in which we reveal Christ to the world around us....and this is not a task accomplished by revealing our physical body.  The revelation of the work of God in our lives is done through our actions and our very person - our whole person: Heart, Body, Mind and Soul. 

And you don't even have to wear a feather headdress and bedazzled bra while doing it.  

How To See Love

                          

What is love?  What is the definition of this four letter word that we toss around so often these days?  How can we eve be sure of what love really is? 

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God

If you take a closer look at that beatitude from Matthew 5, there is something really beautifully significant in this simple sentence.

What is love?  What is the definition of this four letter word that we toss around so often these days?  How can we eve be sure of what love really is? 

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

In 1 John 4:8, God is defined as love.  Love is not simply an attribute to God, or one of his characteristics. He is not ever-ancient, ever-new and loving.  His very essence is LOVE. 

So what if we place the word 'love' into the above beatitude?  It would read:

Blessed are the pure of heart, for they will see LOVE.

True, authentic, will-the-good-of-the-other-as-other love requires a pure heart to be visible.  Without pure intentions, love is just another four letter word ruled by emotions.  With a pure heart, loving others becomes an incredible opportunity to participate in who God is. 

So if you have to ask what's in it for you, or how you can benefit, it's not love.  That's not a pure perspective.

Granted, because of the fall, we will never be able to experience love at it's fullest form : AGAPE love.  This is one of the four Greek loves.  Agape means an unconditional love that is in a constant state of selfless giving and never is self interested.

Human beings can't give this love - only God can.  He shows examples of it throughout the history of His love story with the human race, but one of the key points is at the crucifixion.  Christ takes on a human nature and empties His life on the cross for us.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church paragraph 1015 says, "The flesh is the hinge of salvation.  We believe in God who is creator of flesh; we believe in the Word made flesh; we believe in the resurrection of the flesh, the fulfillment of both the creation and redemption of the flesh."  

God's Agape love poured out in a human nature...that's love.  Give up your only son for a people who don't take time to notice His presence in their daily life...that's love.  That is a love that stems from a pure and Holy heart....and that can only be seen through the lens that is not smeared with a hint of lust.  

Paul wrote to the Ephesians about this topic.  In chapter 5 verse 3, Paul said:

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.

Why is the presence of impurity so improper for a Christian?  Because it takes away the ability to recognize the presence of authentic love.  And when you cannot see authentic love, you are unable to see God's work in your life.  God is love.  

So to see love in the world around us, we must look at others with a giving heart.  In relationships with family or friends, a self-interested core will always taint the ability to see love.  If you look for what you can get out of something, you have missed the point of true love.

God gives us people to love and things to use....not people to use and things to love.

Are you a Hipster Catholic?

It is pretty easy to be a hipster Catholic.  Converse are not that expensive, beanies are easy to knit and fair trade coffee is far to easy to drink. 

There are amazing Catholic blogs out there, great Catholic books, fun Catholic apps, and phenomenal Catholic conferences.

Even Jesus can wear converse

Although we frame the word 'hipster' and stick it on the wall to admire as the most coveted of 'coolness' levels, I believe it is far to easy, at least for myself, to often forget about the day to day life of Catholic living.

So while it's easy to wear Pinterest worth outfits and sip a latte while reading the newest Life Teen article, what does it look like to put that into practice?

To be honest, it's kind of scary.

It means having to put yourself out there, trust God totally, and having to realize that some people may not agree with you.  Or, perhaps even realistically in today's culture, most people won't agree with you.  It means having to be informed about not only what you as a Catholic believe, but why you even profess that to be true. 

It means having to be in love with God. 

There is a growing trend to glamourize the Catholic life by making it appealing to the masses.  Pun slightly intended.  We amp up teen ministry as to make the Catholic faith seem appealing, trendy and worthy of cutting time out of our busy schedule for.  Value is placed on emotions and charismatic feelings so that people will 'feel' right about the Church. 

Rebecca Harding Davis, an American writer from the late 1800s wrote, "We don't often look into these unpleasant details of our great struggle.  We all prefer to think that every man who wore the blue or gray was a Philip Sidney at heart."  We shy away from openly talking about our temptations, the word accountability can seem like a crazy concept to us, and we dance around solid truths so as not to offend anyone.

It's time to rub our face in the dirt of the earth and face the facts.  There is so much need for authentic faith in our world.  The reality is that over 80% of Catholics no longer identify themselves as Catholic by the time they hit their 23rd birthday.  That's huge. 

If you put statistics like that into any other situation, it's alarming.  If you're traveling and your airline has a 20% chance of landing safety, what are the chances that you aren't going to fly on that airline?  If you have a university with a 20% retention rate, things aren't going to well for them.  If you have a 20% chance of passing a class, things aren't looking up.

So why are we content and living with this statistic?  We watch each year as Catholic students walk onto a campus Catholic and four years later walk of the stage with a diploma and their faith far behind them. 

The subject of objective truth is so controversial you would have thought we were talking a crazy conspiracy - but that's how the concept of absolute truth is taught. 

Making Catholicism 'cool' isn't going to solve the problem.  We have to make Catholicism real and, even more importantly, a blatant presence in our daily lives. 

What does that look like in 2014?  First, living our faith.  And not just the parts that we're comfortable in.  It means putting yourself completely in God's hands and letting Him write your story...without you editing as you go along. 

It means lovingly guiding those who are in a state of confusion concerning the teachings of the Church.  Saint Josemaria Escriva once said "Don't you long to shout to those youths who are bustling around you: Fools! Leave those worldly things that shackle the heart - and very often degrade it - leave all that and come with us in search of Love!"

The Church has incredibly beauty to her teachings.  All of them. And most of them aren't discussed.  Why does the Church believe what She believes about contraception, homosexual marriage, social justice, morality, truth and authentic love? There is a reason for each belief, and none are culturally accepted.

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Yet Saint Toribio said, "Christ said, “I am the Truth”; he did not say “I am the custom." 

Are haters going to hate? Heck yes. 

In fact, Christ gave us ample warning about what we are going to face.  John 15:18-21 says, "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. ¹⁹ If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. ²⁰ Remember what I told you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. ²¹ They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the one who sent me."

What do we do about this all this hatred? Shake it off?

I vote rejoice in it.  With the situations in the common culture today, what an incredible opportunity in which to reach out and show the true Catholic life.  Is it always a conversation? No - your life could be the only Bible people read.  Yet that doesn't offer us an out or cop out excuse for not talking about our faith.  Is someone talking about how behind the times the Catholic Church is? Lovingly have an authentic conversation with them.  Don't shirk away from a tough conversation.  Use those conversations to fall even more in love with a God who wants to see you find the easiest way to Heaven. 

And the way that is the sturdiest bridge between here and the next world? The Catholic Church.

Before it was cool.

God bless!

Chloe M.

A Thankful Heart: Day Five

Well, typical Chloe, it's been a crazy couple of days, but I'm back on track.  For now at least.

 

Day five.  There were so many blessings today, I just was overwhelmed.  So, to make up for the days inbetween, here are five reasons for gratitude on this belated day five of my thankful challenge.

 

 

 1

) My little three year old sister who came running in last night during prayers because "tomorrow is Taco Tuesday!"  We may or may not have viewed the Lego movie too much lately.

2) My favorite Matt Maher song played on my way to class this morning.  Commence Catholic fan girl mode.

3) My little sister Emma let me borrow her warm jacket, so I was able to walk back and forth to classes today feeling ice and toasty.

4) The little girl who I give guitar lessons to tonight said Monday nights were not so bad anymore because of our lessons.


5) I got to have a great chat with an elderly lady who came into work last night who said she just needed someone to listen and talk to.  We were able to talk about her holiday traditions now that her family has passed away.

 

GOD IS SO GOOD.  And He constantly finds ways to meet you exactly where you are and make you better...sometimes we just have to open our eyes.

 

God bless!

 

Chloe M.

A Thankful Heart: Day Four

Today I'm pulling the typical white girl card and saying that I'm thankful for Fall.

Or at least what's left of it here in my city.  

On Tuesday the weather is supposed to be around thirty degrees.

So I'm thankful for sweaters without coats over them.

Fall leaves without snow dripping off of them.

Walks to class without freezing my fingers off.

Drives to work without snow on the road.

And general fall weather without the
nagging feeling that winter is just around the corner.

You were made for forever

On my ride home tonight, I was flipping through car radio stations and happened upon Ed Sheeran's "Don't" - a new song of his.  I don't highly recommend the song...there is a lot of not-so-favorable messages and language mixed in with a funky beat (which seems to be the go to in today's music.)

But while I was delving into the words of the song instead of just the sound, I found it.  There, hidden in the bass line and mixed around with the techno beat is a desperate plea.

A call for forever.

Because we were made for more.

For those of you haven't heard the song, the premises is that the singer met a gorgeous girl more than a year ago, but she jumped out of his life as soon as she came in.  Then, just last week, she's back. 

Why is she back all of the sudden? He thinks it's because this lovely lady was "looking for a lover to burn."

So, instead of realizing the temporary lust she is enticing him to, he "gave her my time for two or three nights." Then he does what she did to him....walks out for a couple of months until it's convenient for him to return.

You know humans were made for more than that, right?  More than a one night stand.  More than temporary lust. 

Sheeran's chorus (the radio version, sans expletives) revolves around the fact that he doesn't want to know "that."  He doesn't want to know that this isn't going to last.  That this girl and him are only as temporary as the lust burns...and after those feelings are gone, they're both out of each other's lives, looking for another quick flame.

Verse two continues the destruction of both parties and the objectification of the human being, created in the image of God. 

Sheeran's infatuation  continues.  He "only wanna see her" for a couple of weeks after they've gotten back together.  She moves in, they bond over their hectic schedules and things look to be going quite smashingly.

Until it happens.

The next guy comes in the picture.  He's cute.  She likes him.  They kiss.  Sheeran is confused.  How could she do that when "she knows" that it hurts him?  Her new man and her go all the way, and only a short time later, there she is, at Sheeran's hotel door.

She wants love.  She wants authentic, will-the-good-of-the-other-as-other love.  And he can't give it to her.

Why?  His heart has been taken over by lust and selfishness.  He claims "Trust and respect is what we do this for" but at the same time, he uses this young woman's body for his own pleasure, without regard to the immortal soul that dwells within it.

He says that he never saw this other guy as a threat..."Until you disappeared with him to have sex of course."  Yet he fails to see the irony in the fact that, just a couple of weeks ago, he was doing the same thing with her that he is now irritated at this second guy for.

" And I wasn't looking for a promise or commitment,  but it was never just fun and I thought you were different."

It was never just fun.

We can tell ourselves quite good lies, can't we? 

"Everyone's doing it."
"It's okay...we love each other."
"It's nothing serious. Really."

Really?  Your body is making a commitment that your heart and mind can't keep without the commitment of marriage. 

So, in a sense Ed Sheeran is right - Don't.  Don't throw your body right after your heart in the battle against lust.  Don't reject the beautiful plan God has for you in favor for a temporary satisfaction.

Maybe I'm just rambling.  Maybe this sounds like "Ah lahmlahlah" to you.  But you, regardless of your gender or age, religious affiliation or education level, were made for greatness.

The creator of the universe created you. 

If you ever question your worth...just don't.  See what  I did there?

Si vis Amari ama,

Chloe M.

A Thankful Heart: Day Three

It's amazing how many blessings you realize you've been given when 

you take the time to pause and count them.

Day three finds me thankful for one of my favorite saints:

Saint Pope John Paul II has been playing such an incredible part in my life as of late.

His writings on Theology of the Body have been a topic of many conversations 

and reflective reading time.

I am so blessed to have lived on the earth during the same time as this great man of God.

I can't wait to get to Heaven and meet him!

"The body, in fact, and it alone is capable of making visible that
which is invisible; the spiritual and the divine."
- JPII

A Thankful Heart : Day Two

Day two has passed and with it has come another realization of a loving God.

Today I am thankful for the listening ear of my Heavenly Father.

I was at a religion class tonight, and we were reading through Mark 10. Tonight's focus was on Bartimaeus the blind beggar.  He sat every day outside the gates and waited for
Christ to pass by simply for the chance to call out to the Lord.

Then finally, the day came.  Christ is heard to be passing by and Bartimaeus
seizes the chance, calling out, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!"

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How does Christ respond?

"What do you want me to do for you?"

The Bible and tradition say amazing things.  Jeremiah 29:11 says,
"For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord.  Plans to prosper
and not harm you, plans to give you a future full of hope."

Christ doesn't tell Bartimaeus to just get up, you're healed, go along your own path.

He asks Bartimaeus what he wants.

And even then, Christ doesn't end there.  He cures Bartimaeus's blindness.

Then challenges him.

"'Go your way; your faith has made you well.' And immediately he received
his sight and followed Jesus on the road.'"

There is no coincidence that when Bartimaeus can see, he
follows Christ on the path.

God listens.  And I'm thankful.

Si vis amari ama,

Chloe M.

A Thankful Heart : Day One

Day one of the thankful heart challenge kicks off with one of my truest blessings.  

"Marriage is an act of will that signifies and involves a mutual gift, which unites the spouses and binds them to their eventual souls, with whom they make up a sole family - a domestic Church"

-  Saint Pope John Paul II

My parents take day number one of this grateful list by storm.

Not only are they incredible parents, they are incredible examples of what

a marriage is.

They've been through thick and thin, and their striving for holiness

has shaped who I am, both as their child and now as a Catholic

adult.

A commitment to marriage and willing the good of the other

as other daily is an incredible challenge.  I'm grateful to my mom and dad

for not only living that challenge, but not being afraid

to share with their children the lessons garnered
through marriage - especially as their children prepare
for vocations of their own.

So today I'm thankful.  I'm thankful for two people who genuinely

live out their marriage vows.  I'm thankful for being the result

of a truly free, faithful, total and fruitful marriage.

Si vis amari ama

Chloe M.

Living With a Thankful Heart

Have you ever noticed how much the Bible talks about thanksgiving?  Neither had I...until I started looking and was pleasantly surprised.

The story of thanksgiving can be traced through the entirety of the Bible, culminating in the resurrection of Christ, and continuing in our daily lives as Christians.

Christ gave thanks in good and bad times.  When he saw the doubt of the unbelievers, he gave thanks to the Father, saying, "I thank you Father, Lord of Heaven and earth, that you have hidden these things from the wise and understanding and revealed them to little children" (Matthew 11:25).

Even Christ is noted in his act of thanksgiving: "And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, giving it to them..." (Luke 22:19).

It isn't simply a quick thank you when something good happens in your life, instead it is constant despite circumstances and evident in the life of a believer.  The psalmist writes of this in psalm 105, "Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon his name.  Make known His deeds among the peoples!"

Make known His deeds among the people - sharing your joy and thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving can even be an aid in prayer - and more than an aid, perhaps even a necessity.

Colossians 4:2 says, "Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving."

Watching the world with thankful eyes gives us the ability to see things that otherwise would have slid under the radar.  Drives to work, time with family, school work, quiet evenings, busy times, meetings with friends can all be environments for the development of a thankful spirit with the right outlook.

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To constantly wish you had something else, something better, is a direct waste of the chance to rejoice in what you are given and the situation that God has placed you in now.

Tony Gaskins, a motivational speaker, once said, "To be content doesn't mean you don't desire more, it means you're thankful for what you have and patient for what is to come."  This sums up the thanksgiving outlook exceptionally.  This attitude doesn't mean that you're going to happy all the time...but it does open up opportunities for contentment.


So, for the next thirty days, I'm going to work on being thankful...and being content.  I have a feeling that one is going to quickly lead to the other.  If you're interested in this little journey, and maybe are feeling like you could use a little more contentedness or thanksgiving (or maybe a little bit of both) in your life, you are more than welcome to follow along this month!  My (lofty and perhaps unreachable) goal is to post every day for the next thirty days.

I'm reminded of the classic literature story of Pollyanna by Eleanor Porter.  In the book, the main character, Pollyanna is a glad spirit with a very thankful heart.  She plays the "glad game," where she always looks at each situation she is placed in and attempts to find something to be glad about.  She plays the game no matter how happy or angering the situation is...and learns to be content even in the most uncomfortable and undesirable situations.

A fellow blogger once wrote, "The character of Pollyanna did not strive to ignore reality or avoid the truth of what was happening in her life.  Instead, she chose to face the negative situations head-on and look for the good in them, as any positive  thinking person would.  She chooses the path in life that so few people walk down - a path on which positive thinking blooms and inspiration can be found even in the darkest of places."

Thankfulness precedes miracles.  Thankfulness precedes contentment....and joy in the work that God can do in the lives of His children.

si vis amari ama

Chloe M.